30 and Unmarried

Not being married around the age of 30, specially if you are a woman, is treated like a terminal disease in our society. People look at you with pity and make a point to tell you that they are ‘praying for you’. The sort of pressure people put on these people is unbelievable.

My elder sister is still a couple of years away from 30 and happily unmarried. The sort of stuff people say to her disgusts me. Tears have been shed for her by relatives and people think her life is incomplete where I have never seen a person as fulfilled as her. And damn her for not being married when her younger sister is already ‘settled‘ in life.

Being unmarried in no way means a person isn’t happy. It just means their priorities are different than others. They might want to focus on their career, travel the world, study or any other thing which is no one else’s business. Marriage is great but not everyone wants it instantly because everyone around them is sitting with a ring on their fingers. People confidently come and say crap like ‘ab tum bhe ek acha larka dhoond ker shaadi ker lo‘ as if achay larkay are being sold on a reyrhi at Jumma bazar. Also you never know what someone’s personal dynamics are like, maybe they want to get married but they can’t find someone suitable. Telling them what they are missing on or what they should do is doing nothing but hurting their feelings really.

It will happen when it does. Constantly reminding them of this is not going to get them good rishtas or help them run into the man of their dreams. Leave them alone yaar. Ajeeb bakwas.

4 thoughts on “30 and Unmarried

  1. Oh my god. I love you. I discovered you today. I hear you and see the authenticity of your voice. I’m Ayesha Tariq and I’m an illustrator and a comedienne. I love talking about the elephants in the room, too. Hope to meet you some day! Please keep writing. ❤

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Our society is full of oxymorons. If a girl gets married at 22, she is told she is not ambitious , if she chooses her husband she is talked about in hushed voices in khaandan’s gossip circles. If she goes for arranged marriage, she is considered a simpleton who was never asked out by a boy. It is insane. The aunties in our society need to stop this crap and focus on things that matter in real world. Teach your maid’s kids or volunteer at hospitals. Idle minds and idle talks have done nothing for our society except raising a self-doubting generation.People who like to talk crap can never be happy for others . Phewww.

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